Let’s talk about doing the hand jive

Anonymous: female. straight. how do you give a really good hand job?

Once again, another answer provided from the male perspective by Mathieu.

Hand jobs are tricky and all women are going to be at a disadvantage. That disadvantage being: men have hands too. Also we are inherently professionals at masturbation. One of the first things we discover as babies is that we have feet. Shortly after that we discover we have a penis. And we fixate primarily on that for approximately the next eighty years of our lives. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to discourage you, I just thought I should warn you.

Now onto my actual suggestions: use a firm grip, tighter than you would hold a banana but far less than playing tug of war; you’re trying to pleasure not asphyxiate*. Your second key to a fantastic handjob is: Lubrication. If using store bought lubrication, use as a fair amount and ensure that the entirety of your palm and fingers are covered, as well as an ample amount on the given penis. If you are using saliva, which is nature’s go-to lubricant of choice also the best selling brand of personal lubricant since around 40,000 B.C., use a fair amount. Simply licking your palm does not suffice when performing a hand job, you want to spit into your palm a large amount. Ideally your saliva should be thick, not white and bubbly. You’ll know the right consistency when you feel it—and your boy will know too. As far as motion and gesture goes, that can be taught in the moment. Every man’s penis is different, therefore preferences will vary widely. A tip, however, is that the place wear the head meets the shaft, particularly on the underside of the penis, is extremely sensitive. I wish you all the best in your hand job adventures.

* No, penises do not breath, I’m merely using an allegory for comedic effect.

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